Disappointments

Malcolm began the day at seven in the morning, and had been about to head to his gymnasium when he realised it was a Sunday, and no matter as much as he adored his gymnasium because of the feel good vibes and the crowd which came there, he had to admit that he hated its policy of being shut on Sundays.

He called his peddler had asked him to get seven ounces of marijuana, so that he could fulfill a few orders pending over since last week. He unpacked his gymnasium bag and drank the protein drink he had intended to have later. Undressing and switching on his laptop, he began executing push ups with meticulous movements, very slow and deliberate, the stretch felt along several strands of muscles that inhabited his chest, and a few along the outside of his shoulders.

He did ten more sets of twenty each. One after the other with one minute of rest in between each. His day had begun now. His peddler called two minutes later. Malcolm smiled, perfect timing. His peddler was an old timer, whom he had met eight years ago when he had been in the final year of college, where four years of intoxication and malnourishment, coupled with a lack of care towards things like reading more and networking for relationships. Those missteps had hit him hard, in terms of his lack of clarity about his future. He had been blindly following a path that had been uncharacteristically laid out for him courtesy his failures to harness and push the potential of his mind, that had been bottled inside for so long that he had thought existence was a farce, his conceptions of the world being shaped by a few callous quotes and content accessible on social media.

He wanted to grow and progress, because, who didn’t? As Malcolm saw it, every fight, every conflict, every war in the world was about the fight for resources. And that was the problem. The system of currency was introduced so that resources the world over, natural and man-made could be leveraged and distributed equally to the population, and no doubt, this would ensure prosperity and peace for all. But what wasn’t realised and understood was that, the system needed to be helmed by a select few individuals who were bound to create a scenario where their close circles would benefit the first from their new found awareness, and that in a nutshell created winners and losers the moment any grand event happened upon the world. The network effect, inherently brutal expelled the individuals who through no fault of theirs completely lacked awareness about new developments.

However, development in communications technology changed all that, for worse. Because, now everyone knows or rather pretends to know or hear about everything, with the result that it has become difficult to rise above the mundane and the mediocre in an individual’s quest towards self-development, spewing thousand doubts in between, and a general lack of commitment towards one thing to master it, but rather one ear towards so many things that thoughts become cluttered after a while.

There were so many things to do in the world that Malcolm felt like doing everything. And maybe that was a good thing. The problem was, he realised with increasing frequency that, he was a great thinker but not a doer. He wanted to learn the art of cultivating great habits, albeit it would take patience and disappointment early on, but then that was life, wasn’t it? Life was an endless series of disappointments post which it would reward you with one great victory. When disappointment became a habit, one odd victory would taste doubly sweeter, and probably spur on an individual to fall in love with the journey of creating so many disappointments that, all wrong iterations finally create one master product or service that someone is incredibly adept at inside out.

Malcolm had not yet created a habit of being disappointed everyday, although he was trying his best to do so.

He hit every gymnasium session intending to exert himself to his limits, and still put in one more set to failure. He read books till his eyes drooped. He researched about so many Brands that he knew every promoter by heart. Then he would make sales calls day in and day out, and listen to people’s opinions and rejections, waiting till he got that one golden prospect who would convert into a client.

He loved it when that happened.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s