They met on a pleasant 1st October afternoon and parted ways without a good-bye in the early morning of 25th. It had been the happiest twenty-four days of his life. He jogged his memory trying to think about her words, the strength, the beauty of it, delivered with charm, passion and empathy, her eyes, the radiance, the joy in it, whenever they spoke, face to face, with abundance, not holding back from exploring each other’s deepest fears, ambitions or insecurities.
A very small tear, then a couple of them, were forming in his eyes once every minute passed by, and felt the same familiar stabs which pricked away at his chest, like a burly, efficient woodpecker chipping away on a tree trunk. His insides hurt by now, as he gazed at the golden rays of sunlight seeping in through the window of the cab, he had boarded outside her house, the sounds of two doors shutting reverberating in his ears, as if all the memories they had made together wasn’t of any consequence in each other’s lives. The stabs in his chest continued anew, energized with each new passing thought.
He knew she was the one, in the sense that she completed him, and that they rightfully belonged, deserved to be one, the door had been open, offered to him like an angel offering him a gateway to the stars, meant to live together, plan their lives around each other, and now everything was gone. He sobbed, breaking down in fits and starts, like he had never done before, his heart beating erratically, a full six days before he turned twenty-four years old. How he hated imagining that day now, the wishes, the goodwill. none of it would affect him, he hadn’t imagined it without her presence, her smile, her everything. He felt pathetic, her images flashing through his mind in a haze of delirious thoughts, trying desperately to come to terms with her absence.
He wasn’t worried about her. She was stronger than him, he knew that now. She was going places, her talent, her dedication, focus, second to none. She would open new doors to anywhere and her imagination, stubbornness, limitless in capacity and unwavering in her single-minded pursuit of success and all the harbinger of comfort it bought, all he hoped was, she would remember that he once existed, occupied her thoughts, and keep his memory, albeit a very faint one, and inconsequential considering her life’s circumstances, safe in a corner recess of her mind. He had been such a disappointment, he was sure, in her eyes, he hoped he would get a chance someday to redeem himself, to explain, why he couldn’t take the gateway into her life and dreams, Starr’s dreams.
Carry on Starr, Carry on, bye Starr. May the power we spoke about, we believe in, bring you everything that you pray for, you deserve the world, and he would roam the abyss searching, only hope she would continue to inspire him as she took on her world, and won.