He believed destiny was a word that was created in good humour.
Because to come to think of it, what exactly was destiny? Was every human being and animal meant to fulfil a divine ordinance? Did that mean he or she was born into this life because a divine ordinance had caused the parents to indulge in a session of passion and create a new human being whose purpose had already been pre-determined? And if yes, pre-determined by who? Questions like these occurred to him only when he felt a disconnect, a strange anathema that existed in the environment surrounding him, as if he were someone who was concerned with questions that didn’t really matter to the well-being of a majority of the people with whom he indulged in day to day interaction.
What was anyone seeking out of life?
As far as he was concerned, and no doubt a majority of the world’s population was, as well, there was too much going on around that was not just distracting, but empowering to the select few who harnessed the power of the correct mindset, followed the correct principles of living, that needed to border on following the correct diet, exercise and intellectual pursuits. Cultivating these good habits required one to be on one’s toes, not in the sense of constant multi-tasking, which was bad for the brain, but rather indulging in deep thoughts, reading, writing and conversations.
There were times in his day when he felt s sudden urge to lash out and scream for no reason whatsoever. He just wanted to. Sometimes, he felt as if no one could really make him feel at ease for the simple reason that, deep deep inside the recesses of his mind, he wanted to be disconnected from anyone and everything that was going on. These weren’t healthy thoughts, but that was the whole point. Life was meaningless, purposeless, pointless and aimless. A fortuitous set of circumstances a few billion years ago had caused a chance set of chemical reactions to coalesce and create tiny single celled organisms who had existed, existed and existed to evolve into what life as we know it.
Compared to so much, and considering everything was just an accident, what was the point? What was the point of doing anything, when life was aimless, pointless, meaningless and purposeless?
There was a point. So many points in fact, which bordered from holding one’s loved one into your arms for time immemorial to exceeding expectations of oneself by constantly pushing forward while ignoring all the attempts of the brain to self-sabotage every attempt at self-discipline. He had begun a routine whereby he would connect himself to a pair of earphones while he slept, so that he could set the alarm on his mobile phone to three in the morning and listen to his voice speak to his subconscious that was likely to be active courtesy his body’s deep sleep cycle at that time. He had ensured his voice contained his choicest desires like the woman he wanted to be with to the type of environment he would inhabit in two years, extending all the way for a decade.
He would go against all the self-sabotaging impulsive desires of his brain by vigorously affirming the correct thoughts to his brain again and again and again.